Do, or do not. There is no try.

Well, work and lack of ambition has killed the creative process for now. So on to more important things.

I went to see the new Star Wars movie on Saturday.

I grew up a big fan-boy of Star Wars. My nine-year old self thought that it was the greatest thing that had ever happened to him. And then 12 year-old Wolfdog thought that Empire Strikes Back was even better. At 15, Return Of The Jedi was a bit of a disapointment, Ewoks and shit, ya know.

Then ahead to the adult years and Lucas' prequels. I figured I was just too jaded to appreciate The Phantom Menace as much as the nine year-olds around me did. Attack Of Clones seemed more promising, but still didn't return my wonder and awe that I wanted to experience. But I held hope that the last would be the big finish, everything I ever wanted in a Star Wars movie.

uggg.

The action and special effects were what I expected, I suppose. Very visually pleasing and technically proficient. But then I noticed something. No one seems to have anything worthwhile to say. The characters spoke in the language of repeating plot points. Which wasn't exactly a bad idea, since most of the plot made no sense.

Ok, I won't dissect everything that annoyed me here, but let me get the central theme problem off my chest. Anakin is a good kid. Angry and rash, but basically good. Lucas has to really sell him turning to the 'dark side' in a way that makes sense. And he fails, miserably. Anakin goes from knowing once he reveals the true identity of the chancellor that he needs to kill him, to cutting the hand off the jedi master that is about to kill the evil sith. But what about Anakin killing Christopher Lee at the beginning, under the belief that is the only way to deal with that level of evil? Isn't what Sam Jackson was about to do? WTF?

And now, with the confusion of the confrontation that leaves Sam Jackson dead by the order of the Sith Lord, it is suddenly clear to the idiot that the best thing to do is go kill every little thing in the Jedi temple. Including the 'younglings'.

I'm sorry, but that is some dumb-ass storytelling. So many shortcuts for motivation that it just makes no sense. And making characters repeat the same plot points over and over again doesnt help. It just made me angry.

I'm sure it will break all kinds of box office records, and fill the Lucasfilm coffers to point of breakage. But I can't help to feel that some of that money would have been well spent on a team of competent writers and a director with a feel for something called 'story'.

Ok, it wasn't that miserable of an experience, and I realize at 37, I'm not the target market of the film. But I should be. All of us that were 9 when we first heard the orchestra hit and saw the crawl float into space and were transported to a galaxy far, far away deserve an attempt to end this story with a similar amount of awe and wonder.

Should have followed the example of Peter Jackson, who took a book that filled me with that feeling around the same time as Star Wars, and turned it into a film that was able to do the same 20 some odd years later.